The grammar Nazi

From a FB status:

"If your selling a car on Craigs list make sure you spell at least the name of the car correctly or you make yourself look stupid. Chevy isn't spelled Chevie..."

I suppose that people who cannot properly distinguish between "your" and "you're" don't make themselves look stupid at all. (Not to mention the fact that Craigslist, last time I checked, wasn't two words, but that's less egregious of an error.)

Which brings me to a question/pet peeve. Why can't the average native English speaking, college-educated, monolingual adult in this country use proper grammar/spelling at a fifth grade level? I don't mean making occasional typos or mistaking "your" for "you're" once or twice because you're typing emails at 4 a.m., but really not knowing the difference to the point that you post 14 FB status updates (not that I'm counting), all with the same damn mistakes. Which means that you really don't know that cannot is one word, or that it's is not possessive, etc. I swear we learned this back in fifth grade, or maybe even third grade. Why aren't they teaching this and drilling this ad nauseum in the schools?

It's not like I expect people to know that peruse actually means "to read carefully" or that comprise, used in this context, is incorrect: "The orchestra is comprised of fifty gazillion trombones and two oboes (oboi, if you prefer Italian)" Or that data is a plural noun. That is a should-I-buy-the-Fowler-or-Garner-style-guide?- level nitpick. (Aside answer: Get the Garner. It's very practical, and it's not the annoying prescriptive style editing that I find really narrow. It's really ok to end a sentence with a preposition, as Winston Churchill has once pointed out. )

But you're/your? They're/their? Too/to? C'mon people. Every native English speaker over the age of 11 should have mastery of such basic grammatical concepts.

and four months later. . .

I'm wondering why I'm still on people's blog rolls, since I haven't managed to post a thing during that time.

It has been quite a whirlwind of 4 months, though I have nothing exciting to report, except how much my life has changed. I'm in a foreign country, completely uprooted from the comforts and stability of my past life, far from friends, with very few material things (no TV, no CD player to play the CDs I just bought), surrounded by people who are 10-15 years younger than I am, immersed in full-time despotic regime studies.

Between end of June and early October, I moved a total of 7 times, before finally settling into my current dwelling place.

This move--this packing up of things, the downsizing and selling off of many of my worldly belongings (well, except some of my beloved kitchen stuff and about 20 boxes of books), including my car, the shedding of all of the responsibilities that come with being a productive working citizen (e.g. paying taxes, somehow contributing to GDP, and I dunno--making monthly contributions to one's retirement plan and social security, etc.) and flitting off to a foreign land (to a world class city, no less!) and starting anew sans attachments and hardly any material possessions--it sounds so carefree and romantic, doesn't it?

It certainly did when my friends regaled me with their own U.K. study abroad adventures. The same uprooting. The same packing up of one's belongings and moving on short notice. The same sense of exhilaration over the new and unknown. The excitement. Ah, the excitement. Yes, I remember thinking that, experiencing that, when I finally decided and put my reply in the post.

It influenced my decision to come here. Many of my friends still buy into this romanticized notion of studying in the U.K. I keep getting emails from people who want to hear of my "exciting adventures!" (exclamation mark theirs.)

But now I am here and half done with my program already, and my life couldn't possibly be further from this idealized notion of studying abroad that many of my friends and colleagues seem to have conjured up.

What do I tell these people? That I spend 87 percent of my free time in the library? That my life has become so one-dimensional? That I might as well be studying in Siberia, since it's not like I have time to enjoy or take advantage of the fact that I'm in actually London, where there are hundreds of cool things one can do for free--if one had spare time?

And lest I sound curmudgeonly, don't get me wrong--the wonders of this city hasn't been completely lost on me. In fact, most days this city continues to enchant, and more often than not, I find myself marveling over the fact that, "Wow. I'm really living in London!"--Like on new year's eve when I was there to enjoy the fireworks spectacle among tens of thousands of people and rang in the new year in a city that ranks among the top 10 for NYE celebrations.
Like on Christmas Eve, when I got to enjoy the glories of midnight mass at St. Paul's Cathedral.
Like when I go running along the Thames, just because I can.
Like when I pass by the oldest cathedral church in London on my (almost) daily walk to school and many other cool, old structures or places of historic significance.

But for the most part, the nitty-gritty details of my life (or lack thereof) would disappoint my friends who want to be entertained with stories of my "new and exciting life".

It's not that I expected life to be a picnic, but despite my preparations last year, this return to full-time studenthood has been a tougher adjustment than I imagined. I didn't think I'd have literally no time to explore the city during studies. I thought I'd have plenty of time to go catch a concert or two, frequent museums, or hell, go on weekend excursions to Paris or Lausanne in my spare time. Ha! Spare time.

I thought I'd be grown up enough to not be overconsumed by school. I thought I would've learned by now the importance of work/school-life balance.

Yes, yes. I thought many many things. And well, no sense in dwelling on how different things are from what I expected. I guess things not going as expected is part of this whole experience, though I wouldn't mind a bit more balance in my life. (Again, lest I sound extreme, it's not like I had zero free time, but given the choice between vegging and doing some sort of low brainwave activity or going to a (brain-)taxing classical music concert and sitting through an entire symphony or two. . .I usually chose the former.)

Anyway, speaking of spare time, and lack of it, (in this time, I've also lost the ability to write my thoughts and organize them in a coherent manner. And given my lack of practice and time for editing, you will have to just deal with my Faulknerian stream-of-consciousness style of writing.) I need to wrap this meandering up soon, so I can catch up on my sleep.

So for 2010, I'm hoping for better work-life balance and better composure, though with the libraries threatening to be open 24/7, and the material only getting harder, plus the added burden of a thesis, I'm not sure exactly how this will happen.

Happy New Years to y'all. And perhaps if I have some time before classes start, I will post something on what I have been learning, because despite my whining, some of it is actually quite fascinating stuff.

Why Citibank is having troubles

In short, it's because the people who work there are idiots. I mean, class A idiots. They might only take the best and the brightest from places such as Harvard and Stanford (they don't even deign to interview at my alma mater), but these people have zero common sense. To wit:

I have been trying to obtain a visa so I can properly study how to become a despotic ruler. But one needs a visa to do this, and one needs proof that one has enough money to study this to submit an application for a visa.

Thus, on 18 July, I requested such a letter. My appointment with the visa people (which I have already had to postpone once) is 12 August--roughly 4 weeks later. In four week's time, I have learned a year's worth of advanced statistics material. I've attended my first prom. (of the British musical variety--not the high school dance) I've seen Waiting for Godot. I've moved 3 times. I've learned how to say "United Kingdom" in French.

And these people can't properly mail me one stupid letter, so I can study to become a despotic ruler some day.

Why has 4 weeks passed and still no proper visa letter?

July 18: I send email to my banker requesting visa letter. I tell him that this is a standard format--on official letterhead, stamped and list the information that is needed--exact amount in my acct, acct #, etc.

July 21: No reply. I send follow up email asking if he has received my request.

July 22: banker was away for personal reasons. Says he'll get right on it. Let's call this visa letter #1.

Fine. So 4 days lost, but for valid reasons. No big deal. I will be in the UK for another 13 days. Plenty of time for a letter to reach me. I confirm that he has my UK address and wait.

July 29: still no letter. I follow up and ask him when he sent the letter. As a precautionary measure, I ask him to have the letter sent to my address in Djibouti, where I will be flying to in a few days. (This would've been visa letter 1.5 had he sent it out as requested, but he didn't.)

July 30: banker emails me and tells me that the letter (visa letter #1) got sent back to him. He asks to confirm my address.
-I am puzzled by this, b/c I asked my roommates for the exact address. I confirm the address details (which match the address I emailed him); I re-send him the address. I don't want to condescend, but just in case, I remind him that one needs international postage rate, and that one needs to write the country and "Air Mail" on international correspondence.

-At this point, I'm not confident it will get to me by 4 Aug (my departure date), so ask him again to also send it to my address in Djibouti (we shall call this visa letter #2).
-I also reconfirm the exact details of what I need in the letter: bank acct. #, how long I've held the acct, date, amount in account, etc.

-Meanwhile, I fill out an online visa application form and make an appointment at the visa office for 7 August at the Djibouti office.

Aug 5: I arrive in Djibouti; visa bank letter is still not there.

Aug 6: Still no visa letter. I call Mr. Banker to ask him when he sent the letter; he says 31 July. At this point, I also ask him what was wrong with the original letter he was supposed to send to the UK. He tells me he didn't bother writing "UK" or "Air mail". No international stamp, either.

I think to myself, damn. I couldn't even get an interview w/ you guys, and I've known to write Air Mail to (country) on all international correspondences, since about 5, which was evidently when I started writing letters to my grandparents. With help.

-I cancel my visa appt. scheduled for the next day, and reschedule for 12 August.

August 7: Still no visa letter. Just in case, as another precautionary measure (since it was Friday, and if the visa letter (#2) didn't arrive on Saturday, I'd have no recourse to do anything about it till Monday U.S. CA time, by which time it would've been too late. . .), I request that a third letter be expedited to my Djibouti address. (This is visa letter #3.)

Banker obliges; I thank him and obsessively track progress of document.

August 10: I receive visa letter #3. (#2, which he sent out via snail mail is still not here.) I open up visa letter #3, and this is how it reads:

Dear _______________,

This Letter (sic) is to confirm that Anzu has a valid account with Citibank. She probably has a balance of about _________ in the account. If you need to verify this, please call me at _________.

Probably has a balance of about.

Probably has a balance of about.

Ok, if you worked at an international bank which boasts of being worldly, would you seriously write an official letter that I need as verification in this manner? But here was the letter staring straight at me with those exact words.

People (warning. Lots of expletives ahead. . .), I can't f-ing get a visa to enter the UK with a letter that speculates that I "probably have a balance of about".

Or the U.S. for that matter.

How does anyone with half a brain think that saying I "probably have about" _______ dollars counts as an official document??

This is a f-ing visa letter for f's sake. You know-- an official appeal to the UK government to get permission to live there for a year or so. So I can study to become a despotic ruler and behead everyone who is this stupid. (Ok, not really. It's been 4 weeks since I've requested this letter, and I still don't have a legitimate letter in my hands, I have an appt. w/ the visa office in less than 2 days, and I just spent 4 hours on the phone w/ the Citibank people in the U.S. trying to see what can be done about this. It takes a minimum of 3 weeks to process a visa application, and I need to be back in the UK on September 1. So you do the math. I haven't even mentioned my sick grandmother who I can't visit, until I get this visa pickle squared away. Thus, now you see why I'm not exactly of the most rational disposition right now. . . which is probably a bad time to be posting a blog entry, but I'm on hold and held hostage here while someone in the Citibank Djibouti office checks to see if they can help me. Update: they can't.)

And you wonder why the financial sector is in dire straits.

Also, note to people who know me personally-- if I'm being obsessive and pesky about a request that is important, and state the obvious, now you know why. I mean what 20-something (who works for an international bank) needs to be told that you need to put international postage and the country name on a letter that you send overseas?

A tale of two apartments

Actually, it's the same apartment, but photographed on different dates.

1. Before June 10:

2. Current state of affairs
Same room, on 16 June:
No wall decor, and no furniture-- at least in the living and bedrooms.

However, it's much improved from how it looked just 2 days ago:
And the bedroom:
Not that I ever had that much furniture to begin with, but kindof looks spacious w/o the furniture.
(Sigh.)

Men--vain or illogical?

Why are men so damn vain? But before we ponder this, here's a GRE math question:

Marsha, a half-time student who works full-time, does not have a lot of free time. She told her friend Fred that she did not have time this weekend to do dinner, because she was studying for exams. Which of the following activities would Marsha most likely agree to, if Fred were to ask her to join him?:

a) A study-break that involved getting frozen yogurt on campus (~30-40 minutes)
b) a casual dinner at a Thai place (~1-1.5 hours)
c) formal sit-down multi-course dinner (3+ hours)
d) dinner and concert or opera in the city (~6-7 hours)
e) Going to see the Ring cycle

But to return to the question of vain men who think d is the answer. . .

Ok, it's not that I'm not interested in you. But I have too much going on right now to have the energy to pursue this. People really don't seem to understand this. Really it baffles me, b/c my gender seems to get the whole "sorry, I'm too preoccupied to hang out right now" thing. I sure as hell get it. If someone-- friend, love interest, etc. told me, "hey, I'm going to be busy these next few weeks and might not have time to hang out much", I'll call or email to check up on them-- maybe invite them for a quick tea or something, but otherwise, give that person space, until they are done with whatever they need to do. But guys. Eh. Why do you people not get it? Also, if I don't have time to do dinner with you, why, why, why do you think I have time to go see a 3-hour opera with you? In the city? Really. I DON'T UNDERSTAND YOUR GENDER. Because you're not the first guy who has done this-- which might mean that I'm being too subtle. But I think I told you very point blank, that I'm going to be preoccupied till my classes are over and that I'd have more free time mid-June-ish (which is now a lie, b/c now, I'm scrambling to move).

It's flattering and endearing and all, but I just don't have the time/energy for this right now. And ok, maybe I'm also slightly not as into it either, b/c if this were Mr. Guy-I-have-a-mad-crush-on, I'd try to find some time. For dinner, though. However, as I've mentioned, I'm juggling school and work, am trying to move in less than a month and now, I'm sick and miserably behind (to the point that I'm blogging). And we've already established that my brain cells can only handle two things at a time and I'm currently doing 3.5.

I don't mean to sound ungrateful or curmudgeonly (though of course, we all know that "I don't mean to do X is a signal that X will happen. . ..), but I don't understand how we went from "Sorry--I'm kindof tied up for the next few weeks till mid-June; but I'll have much more free time to hang out and stuff once classes are over" to "Wanna go do opera and dinner in the city with me?" If I weren't dealing with a move, and the end of the quarter and finals and final problem sets, then the answer would probably be a yes. But I tend to be very one-track-minded about my time and things that need to get done (studies, learning choir music, etc.) and get protective about my time, especially the more people pester me about it.

Or maybe I'm commitment-phobic, b/c he was fine when he was just another dude in my Tai Chi class. (Note: it may or may not actually be a Tai Chi class. But this internet is a small world, thanks to the power of Google, so if I write Linda's Pole-Dancing Studio, there's probably a higher possibility of someone in my class actually landing here. So pole-dancing, Tai Chi. . . it's all the same. Oh, except the partnering up thing doesn't quite work with Tai Chi. Hmm. Well, no matter. Just humor me.) We partnered up a couple of times and got along, so we exchanged emails. I should've figured out then that that was a sign of interest. Again, it's not that I wasn't interested in him, but if I'm taking classes, I hate that I'm like this sometimes, but the class and learning the material pretty much trumps everything else in my life--including even work.

Anyway, he asked me out to dinner a few times, and actually, each time, I legitimately couldn't, either b/c I already had plans or 3 out of the 5 nights a week (1 night a week, we go to the Tai Chi class, which leaves me one night a week to leave open for dinners, etc.), I actually have to work really late, to make up for the time spent in class. Then weekends? I hate when people start asking me minute details of my schedule, but I can honestly say that most weekends I've spent 80 percent of it working on school work. One weekend I played in a BANG, which meant staying up till 3 a.m. every weeknight to finish enough of the problem set so I can play guilt-free for six hours, and another weekend, I went out of town to see my friend's newborn, and 2 of the weekends, I helped a friend who was moving into her new house--but other than those aberrations, my life revolved around problem sets and exams. But I didn't want to keep saying no, so I finally had coffee w/ him one evening after Tai Chi class so I could tell him I'm-not-not-interested-but-I've-got-too-much-going-on-right-now; why-don't-we-revisit-this-in-3-weeks sort of thing. I thought he finally got it, b/c the every-other-day emails finally stopped. But no. I don't have time for a local dinner, so now, I suppose I have time to go to an opera and do dinner beforehand in the city.

Men. Sigh. Why are you people so damn illogical?

Bad Audience Manners. . .

This time, I was the one guilty of the transgressive behavior.

So a question to all you performer types. Suppose someone wants to attend your recital, choral concert, etc., but a)he/she doesn't have the energy to sit up, sohe/ she wants to listen lying down in one of the pews, and b) about halfway into the second part of the program, the person's energy is drained to the point of needing to leave in the middle of a piece.

Would you rather that someone like that just stay at home and not bother coming to your performance?

That probably would've been the sensible thing to do.

I don't normally go to concerts when I'm feeling, well, dizzy to the point of needing to lie down and not being able to make it to the end of the concert. But a)I have not been able to go to a single classical music performance since last holiday season, b)my friend was performing in this concert, and c) I thought some Haydn choral pieces in the reverberant Memorial Church would be a nice way to wind down the quarter. Also, this might be the last concert I might be able to attend of his, and he has always been a loyal audience of our concerts. So I went.

The place was barely full, so there were many many empty pews. Thus no one gave me odd looks when I occupied half a pew and lay (laid? layed? er, I think it's lay. . .) down.

The program was Haydn's Schöpfungsmesse and Missa Brevis. I was hoping that they'd perform the Schöpfungsmesse first, and then I could leave during intermission. But no. However, it turned out for the better, since I haven't heard the Missa Brevis before, whereas I've performed the Creation Mass before and so was familiar with it. However, I haven't heard it live in years.

The MB was lovely, except that the stuttering/hiccupping during the Gloria made my pew vibrate in such a way that it exacerbated my dizziness. Generally, though, I'm not a fan of the Brevis format. We've sung the Britten version (which has an awesome but ominous-sounding organ line) but I'd rather hear each line separately.

After the intermission, I stayed for half of the Schöpfungsmesse. I mean, I would've stayed for the whole entire thing, if my body hadn't suddenly rebelled and crashed. I found the next least disruptive entrance (loud brass, fortissimo section) and tried to exit as quietly as I could.

* * * *

I spent the next 2.5 days in bed, completely out of commission, so in retrospect, I probably should've stayed home, even though I don't necessarily regret going.

Trying to downsize, but blogging instead

What does one do with a beloved instrument that one no longer plays--an instrument that one has had since 14 and has been sitting and collecting dust for the past few years?

I guess the sensible thing to do, if one is contemplating downsizing is to get rid of it. But I feel like part of my soul would be going with it.

And so I'm doing the un-sensible and babbling about it in this anonymous introspective medium to see if I can sort out my thoughts. In other words, procrastinating from doing what I'm supposed to be doing--which is to figure out a grand plan to downsize.

I went through a box of old music hoping to get rid of some of it, but failed. The Wolfhart, the Suzuki volumes, the Carl Flesch scale book, the Barenreiter scores of Bach concertos, the used book of easy Telemann duets that I got in a small market in Debrecen, the Palestrina and Bach scores I got with the intention of playing w/ S, the piano book for the third beginning piano class I took one summer at Stanford, b/c in order to stay on as a research/course assistant, I had to take five units worth of classes. . .

This is the problem with "packing" up boxes from one's past--you end up spending more time unpacking and unraveling and very little actual packing ends up getting done. (Especially if you decide to blog about it in the midst of doing this.)

And how did a few sheets of music here and there add up to several boxes, I wonder.

Speaking of boxes, I should get back to the task at hand. (Yes, I have ADD.)

Things to do before I'm--well, I'm already 40ish, but here's a "wish to do" list, with no particular timeline, inspired by Yv's "Things to Do before 30" list. (You young one!!)

1. Continue to learn new words, which means reading lots and looking up words every time I don't know what it means and keeping a vocab list, which I already do.

2. Read all of Shakespeare's works. I think I've read most of his major ones, but I haven't consulted a list in years.

3. Read War and Peace and go through the "top 20" list I got from one of the fellows.

4. Be able to identify all countries in Africa. Actually, in general, I need to improve my geography.

5. Gosh, I would love to do calligraphy, but no instructors here.

6. I would also love to take up violin again and learn piano, but I don't have the time to do this right now.

7. Places I'd like to visit: Cambodia, Thailand, Scotland, Mexico, Italy (without killing my relatives) and many many more places.

8. Use my manual camera more.

There's more, but I'd like to spend the rest of this evening reading. So I suppose see you in a few months, since classes start up again next week.

Note to self

If your friend tells you about his composing angst and says something about his fear of not being able to compose "something better the next time", do not tell him that "well, Mahler didn't compose anything to match his second symphony after he wrote that, and no one seems to hold it against him. . ." because it will not go over well.

The problem with taking classes whilst working full-time

. . .is that I have virtually no free time, which is why this blog has been relegated to the back burner. One of my friends once told me that he can do at most two things before he feels like he's stretching himself too thin. He made this point to explain how he couldn't have both a time-consuming hobby and a girlfriend at the same time. It was either grad school and girlfriend, or grad school and time-consuming hobby, but he couldn't do all 3 to his satisfaction. I'm starting to see his point. Well, ok, there are people like Yv who can do a zillion things. . .but I am convinced she is superhuman, b/c she studies French, Vietnamese, writes lots, reads lots, does yoga, volunteers, and on top of this, does calligraphy. I am not a superhuman, so I can juggle at most 2 or 3 things at a time. It's not that I have zero time, but it becomes an issue of prioritizing and allocating time to 6 or 7 different things I want to do.

Since I've started taking classes, I don't think I've listened to more than 1 or 2 new pieces, which I realize is dismal. And live music? I don't think I've gone to hear anything since the start of the new year, though I intend to rectify this once opera season starts back up again in a few months.

One problem is that I get back from work/classes late, and then I'm typically exhausted/hungry. I've always got homework or readings to do, which by the time I get home from work, eat, clean up, etc., typically doesn't get started till around 9 or 10 (later if I decide once in a blue moon to take my bum to the gym, since I haven't had the luxury to go running or bike into work much anymore).

Thus I've been too tired/brain dead to give anything a serious listen.

I used to think that music (mostly classical, though I guess all genres) was very high on my priority list, but I've noticed over the past six months that when I get busy/tired, it is one of the first things to go. So in econ-speak, my demand for classical music (if we use time as a measure instead of cost)is highly elastic. And here I thought it was an indispensable part of my existence.

It's no wonder I have trouble getting my non-music-prioritizing friends to get out to our concerts.

Which got me wondering--why is music-appreciation so demanding?

One of the main things for me is that it's hard to break it down. True, many forms--symphonies, quartets and sonatas break down into smaller movements, but I hate the KDFC method of listening to just isolated movements. Which means that if I want to listen to Mahler, I need to find 1+ hour, which is hard to come by these days.

Whereas if I'm reading a book, I can pretty much stop whenever I need to, and pick up where I left off. Sometimes, If several days pass between readings, then I need to read a few earlier chapters to refresh my memory, but for the most part, if I want to read Tolstoy's War and Peace, I don't have to sit down and read it in one sitting. Not that I watch them that often, but I can even do this with movies. But with music, it's the whole piece or bust. I can't listen to just movement one of a
Bartok quartet and be done with it, or listen to a piece in 12-minute snippets at a time the way I sometimes read books or listen to a radio program.

To add to this, if it's a completely new piece, or something I haven't listened to in a while, or even an interpretation of a familiar piece, I like to listen to it several times (not all in the same day), perhaps listen to a different interpretation for comparison, so then it's not just an hour we're talking about.

Of course, since I haven't been listening to much, I haven't had much to say pertaining to music. (sigh)

I have lots to say pertaining to my life, but this requires allocating time to write something coherent.